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Apple's Twitter account rises from the dead -- sort of

Technically Incorrect: Having been dormant for years, Apple's feed suddenly begins to edify just days before the iPhone unveiling. Except it isn't edifying with the usual tweets.

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.

I can't remember the last time Apple thanked me.

Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Apple and social media have traditionally had a relationship akin to Hillary Clinton and press conferences.

The company knows social media is a thing. It just isn't sure that social media is Apple's sort of thing.

Take Apple and Twitter. The official Apple Twitter account has existed since September 2011. It hasn't, however, emitted anything other than crickets.

Until now.

As Apple girds its loins for its iPhone event on September 7, its Twitter account has twitched and emerged from its self-imposed coma.

When I say "emerged," it's more that it's slipped out of bed and called a few friends to tell them it's OK.

Instead of actually tweeting furiously like Trump about how Apple will make America great again, the account has merely inserted the image from its event invitation as its background picture.

It's also emitted one tweet. You won't see it in Apple's timeline. That's because it's a promoted tweet.

The idea is that if you retweet it, you'll get a thank you message from Apple.

Well, that's if you retweet it without adding any of your own feelings. This morning, I retweeted it twice.

The first time, I added a message about how fascinating it was that the account had risen from the grave.

This was ignored by Apple.

The second time I simply retweeted it without comment. Lo, I beheld a tweet from Apple that thanked me for just shutting up and retweeting its promoted tweet.

More precisely, it read: "@ChrisMatyszczyk thank you. We'll send you a reminder shortly before the event. See you on the 7th."

It's unclear what Apple intends to do with the account. Some have speculated it will live-tweet the Wednesday event. Apple didn't respond to a request for comment.

Live-tweeting would be something. Something from quite a few years ago, that is.

How much more enlightening it would be if the account revealed backstage footage as the members of management all adjusted their shirts to hang outside their jeans with perfect smoothness.

Wouldn't you also like to learn something of the last-minute conversations between Tim Cook and his fellow presenters?

So who's got a good joke about Samsung and batteries? Phil?

I've got one, Tim: It's finally true that with Samsung's phones you get more bang for your buck.

Good one, Phil.

One can only hope that, after the event, this Twitter account doesn't return to sleep mode.

These are times when Apple should have a lot to say. And Twitter is surely the right place to say just about everything.