It doesn't seem as if the characters of the Star Wars universe would ever smell very good. It's gotta be sweaty in those stormtrooper uniforms and crammed in those X-wing cockpits. And someone's always getting stuffed inside a tauntaun or jammed up against Jabba, who just looks like he smells like old pickles in a pillowcase.
But if you've ever thought to yourself, "How I long to smell like a Jedi," here's your chance. Lifetime Fragrances, a perfume manufacturer in Germany, now offers a line of Star Wars perfumes and colognes.
Eau de toilette Jedi is described as a woody-aromatic scent that "exudes positive energy."
For those who've turned to the Dark Side, eau de toilette Empire has an oriental-woody scent.
The lone scent aimed at women, Amidala, is described as a fruity-oriental fragrance, mixing notes of green apple, patchouli, vanilla and musk, among others.
If the scents don't sell you, perhaps the bottle design will do it. All three fragrances are sold in what look like lightsaber hilts -- black and red for Empire, blue and silver for Jedi, and a very C-3P0 gold and silver for Amidala.
It's looking as if the scents are only sold in Germany, at least for now. Should the company ever open a store in the US, we've got a slogan to suggest. How about Han Solo's command to Chewbacca as they were about to dive into the trash compactor? "Get in there, you big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!"