Customer product reviews might seem an unlikely source for online humor, but BoingBoing pointed us to these snarky reviewers (thanks to ytmnd.com) who have some funny things to say about Amazon.com's 128-ounce jug of Tuscan Grade A milk.
Here are a few sample reviews:
"Amazing" from John Spuler: "This milk was amazing. Upon my first sip, I felt a spiritual uplifting. A new outlook on religion, life, everything. I began walking with springs in my shoes; metaphorically, of course. It was a new life for me. This milk had reincarnated the dead, old me, who once enjoyed life. Now I know what it feels like to be a religious zombie."
"Al Gore approved" from "a kid's review": "I ran out of gas the other day while driving my wife to the dentist to get her teeth fixed. Luckily, I had a gallon of Tuscan Whole Milk in the back. I opened up the bottle and let er' flow into the tank. Sure as my wife is toothless, the car got me to the dentist and back. I now use it as my primary fuel source. This milk can also be used to lube your car in a pinch; it's thick, creamy greatness lubes my cylinders very nicely."
"WARNING!!!" from Odin S: "This product seems to have severe compatibility issues with laughing as on two different occasions it has come out of my nose instead of going down my throat during laughter! Be smarter than me and wait for the first service pack before buying!"