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Christmas Gift Guide
Gadgets

Jesus loves tech journos

It's Christmas! Thank God for small mercies. In fact, thank God for Jesus, because otherwise late December would be utterly pants and I wouldn't get a break from tech hell.

It's Christmas! Thank God for small mercies. In fact, thank God for Jesus, because otherwise late December would be utterly pants, and I wouldn't get a break from tech hell.

No, this job isn't all about travelling to exotic locations and cavorting with the Pussy Cat Dolls. It's late nights, incessant deadlines and mandatory harassment from people who are trained in the art of pretending they like you. It's a bit like being a pop star but instead of fame, fortune or groupies you get the occasional free USB key.

Then when you get home, exhausted but proud because your reviews have helped millions of people avoid buying tat, your family ring up to ask which laptop to buy, or to see if you can come round and mend their Windows registry.

I've had enough. Tech manufacturers of this world: take your gizmos, your gadgets, your megahertz and your memory, and shove it. Preferably somewhere the sun don't shine. Me? I'm shutting down my PC for Christmas, I'm throwing my mobile phone in the bin, and you know what? For the first time in ages I may stop concerning myself about whether people should buy the 2GHz chip or save a fiver and go for the 1.83MHz version.

Let's all switch off and have ourselves a merry little Christmas. See you for more techtastic delights in 2007. Maybe.