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Five things I would never have said about Marvel movies in 2008

Commentary: Dunno if you've noticed this, but "Captain America: Civil War" was kind of a big deal. And a good time to stop and reflect briefly on the series.

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Marvel

Spoiler-free review of "Civil War" is here. Various other commentary here and here and here and here and here (video). In this particular post, spoilers, spoilers, SPOILERS. All right?

This is because "Civil War" could have been the best movie of the entire series, and it wasn't; but it was still pretty great, and there probably won't be a better one.

Instead of the tremendous number of words I could have spent expanding that, here are five thoughts I never would have had a few years ago:

1. I wish they would let Tony Stark grow up or something

The great thing about the 2008 "Iron Man," what really set it apart, was here was a superhero who actually enjoyed his powers. Here was a guy who owned what he was and had fun. It was awesome. It was different. It changed everything.

Now, we've got a guy so blind to his own mistakes that he reacts to creating Ultron by building another, more powerful AI, then deals with killing a college kid by endangering a high school kid (Peter Parker, dragged into the plot from actual high school for very little reason). (Yes, I read the comics. No, that doesn't apply here.) He's the Don Draper of the MCU at this point. It's not even cute anymore. Quit shaming the guy and let the genius be less stupid.

Also:

Called it!

2. I'm not sure I'm on Cap's side for some of this

I love the guy, the performance, his friendship with Bucky, the whole deal. But "Civil War" worked pretty hard to shake that up. Yes, he learned not to trust corrupt organizations in previous movies and they drew the parallel with the Winter Soldier being forced to obey orders, but his morally superior, patronizing side is not that attractive ("Every time I think you're looking at things the right way -- ") and the whole "I should have the right to interfere anywhere in the world because I'm the spirit of America" bit is disturbing, right? Hard to cheer for? No? Also that last voiceover is downright Scumbag Captain America.

3. Man, I am such a Black Widow fangirl

Her quiet smiles in between electrocuting people are basically all I need to be happy for a week. That and Sam and Bucky crammed into a VW bug.

4. I don't mind that Thor wasn't in this

Baffling.

5. WHY IS NO ONE ELSE TALKING ABOUT HOW HAWKEYE IS FOUR COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PEOPLE IN FOUR DIFFERENT MOVIES

Thank you and goodnight.