There have been several nights in my life when I've looked up at the night sky, seen gaggles of what people told me were birds and thought: "Wait, those are killer alien mustaches."
I am delighted, therefore, that the wise minds at Intel and Toshiba have come together to bring digital life to my fears.
For they are launching an interactive social film -- which is, I believe a film in which you can scare yourself as well as your social network -- called "The Power Inside."
The conceit of this oeuvre is, oh, you won't believe me. Let me quote Intel's own fair hands: "The film's plot follows an alien invasion by a race of extraterrestrial mustaches and unibrows who take over the upper lips and eyes of people around the world."
Yes, not only mustaches, but killer unibrows too.
I can feel you bringing your hands to your faces to see whether you have already been affected.
I can see you Googling images of the New Orleans Hornets' Anthony Davis and wondering whether he is all he seems. Or, perhaps, a little more.
All that I can officially tell you about this movie is that you can audition to be in it. Yes, you can star alongside Harvey Keitel and several other fine Hollywood actors.
Just sniff out the scene at The Power Inside's site and see whether it makes the hairs on your face stand on end.
Naturally, should you get a part, you may be asked to commit compromises. The Toshiba Ultrabooks with Intel-inspired innards will surely play a large role in saving the world. You may have to learn to operate one.
I have embedded the trailer, so that you can get yourself in the full psychological mood for your role.
Please excuse me now. I must go and shave.