The CNET astrology report
The CNET astrology report
1:47

The CNET astrology report

Science
>> Welcome viewers to the CNET Astrology Report. I am the Mystical Altair. I will do what I can to tell you how the stars will affect your digital lifestyle. Aries--Blue Screen of death, invalid page fault. You will have these plague you for a while. Don't fret; it will end in two weeks. Taurus--don't look now, but I think you may have a key logger on your PC; Gemini--forget the flamers, your blog is going to make you money this month; Cancer--Big payday from River is coming and it's a good time to send friend requests. People will respond. Leo--You rebate will finally arrive. Don't spend it all in one place. Virgo--You little Vixen. Everybody loves your twitters. Libra--Believe it or not your Blackberry really will make you more successful; Sagittarius--I'm sorry. Turn off the iPod before you get fired. Don't say I didn't warn you. Capricorn--Your network connection will suck this month. Sorry. Aquarius--Not a good time to comment on the blogs. Just stay away from them for now. Pisces--Take this opportunity to fix people's computers because you can do no wrong right now, you little fish you. Come back next time that is all I have. The Mystical Altair will guide you from the beyond. >> Altair's Mystical guidance is not based on actual science or technical evaluation and should not be taken as guaranteed tech buying advice. For that go to CNET.com and read the Reviews. Altair is not an actual astrologer nor is that actually Altair's real name. Void where prohibited.

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