Buy a scale on Amazon, and it thinks you're a drug dealer

A man looks to buy a mini-scale on Amazon. The site then suggests he also needs a rolling tray, zipper bags, and rolling paper. It really works. I've tried it.

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I have no evidence that this scene was shot after shopping on Amazon. Jovanni Santos/YouTube screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

The world now dominated by algorithms is based on one simple premise: Human beings are predictable.

You think you're some kind of original, but honestly, you're no more individual than Mr. Halfwit at Number 24. Or Jay Leno.

Please admit that, time and again, you're both amazed and aghast at how your favorite retail or news site knows exactly what you're looking for.

An example of this is if you search for a mini-scale on Amazon.

The specific scale I'm thinking about is the American Weigh Signature Series Silver/Black AWS-100 Digital Pocket Scale, 100 by 0.01 G.

Perhaps you know it. Perhaps you have one already. In which case, it's likely you're a drug dealer.

Indeed, Amazon has possibly already suggested to you that you might also like to buy 1,000 1.25" x 1.25" Zip Bags Baggies Clear 2mil Brand New.

Or perhaps the RAW Rolling Paper PERFORATED Tips (10 booklets of 50ct).

Its algorithm also feels sure that the Raw Rolling Tray + Raw 110mm Roller + Raw King Size Rolling Papers Bundle is entirely up the scale-buyer's cranial passage.

A Redditor called The_Mastor was the one who brought this idea to the world's attention. He says he was interested in it because he needed to perfect a Soylent recipe.

I will leave you to declare: "Of course he did."

I, meanwhile, simply tried the search for myself and indeed was suggested all of the above items (and more).

Of course, we shouldn't be surprised. There's that deep, trembling ego at our core, the one that wants to be known, followed and, by extension, loved.

For this, we give up our secrets. For this, we cheerily allow ourselves to become labeled. Until we are, indeed, little more than a number.

Remember, the meaning of life is 42.

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A sampling of my own search. Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

 

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