You know you've got issues if your skivvies start texting

The SIMsystem, electronic underwear that first appeared on ABC's New Inventors program in 2008, is now being rolled out across New South Whales in Australia.

Simativa

SIMsystem, hailed as the world's first electronic underpants, are being rolled out across Australia's largest state--New South Wales--following what have been deemed successful trials.

Resembling its politely named predecessor, the incontinence pad (not to be confused with the iPad), SIMsystem's new-and-improved skivvies come equipped with a sensor strip that alerts caregivers to wetness via text message or, as if the situation couldn't get any more embarrassing, over a facility's paging system. All without ever zapping one's private regions!

Simativa

The above diagram really says it all. When the "event" occurs, the sensor strip is read by the close and ever-attentive SIM box, recorded in real time on the computer with which it wirelessly communicates (using ZigBee), cataloged in a bladder report that can be printed at any time, announced via text message or pager, and finally wiped to near oblivion, though it has left its indelible, electronic mark.

It's nice to know that in the end, as sophisticated as our sensory and alert systems have become, we all still have to go, and we all still need it taken care of. Embarrassing? Absolutely. Messy? Without a doubt. Human? You bet your bottom's SIM box.

About the author

Elizabeth Armstrong Moore is based in Portland, Oregon, and has written for Wired, The Christian Science Monitor, and public radio. Her semi-obscure hobbies include climbing, billiards, board games that take up a lot of space, and piano.

 

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