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Watch alleged burglars run after hearing home owner's voice of God

Technically Incorrect: A New Jersey home owner installs tech that makes an announcement to intruders. They freak.

Chris Matyszczyk
2 min read

Technically Incorrect offers a slightly twisted take on the tech that's taken over our lives.


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They were there. Then they were gone.

NJ State Police/Facebook screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Burglars will burgle.

But home owners will increasingly avail themselves of technology to protect their abodes while they're out.

So it is that, according to a New Jersey State Police Facebook post, two burglars entered a house Tuesday morning in Upper Pittsgrove Township, Salem County.

They allegedly kicked down a side door, but they weren't ready for a voice from the heavens.

Once they'd gotten used to the barking of the dogs in the house, they suddenly heard the owner herself.

"The home owner noticed the intruders remotely from surveillance," said the police. "Said home owner was able to address said perps remotely."

What did she say? "Welcome, please help yourself to some Armagnac," perhaps? It seems not.

"We shall not repeat what was said," said the police. "But needless to say, the burglars read the message loud and clear. They were able to steal a lockbox containing jewelry and personal documents before being scared away."


Though the video wasn't released with audio (perhaps to avoid sensitive ears hearing some New Jersey invective), it's clear the intruders were startled and skedaddled before they could inflict even more upset.

The New Jersey State Police didn't respond to a request for comment.

However, the home owner must have used some extremely choice and heartfelt phraseology. Perhaps she also encouraged her dogs to bite the intruders.

Some might wonder why the home owner gave herself away. Would it not have been better to call the police and surprise the alleged burglars while they were still in the course of their actions?

Is the temptation too great, in fact, to speak to intruders when, at best, you might scare them but you might not?

Still, it must be relatively freaky if you break into someone's home and hear a voice that might, indeed, be God's.

Perhaps it at least incites a sense of guilt.

Oh, who am I trying to kid?