The Vodafone network has been hit by, struck by, a smooth criminal. An unknown number of UK customers have been left without phone, text or data signal after a break-in at a technical facility during the night.
The problem appears to have started at some point during the small hours of Monday morning and is still continuing, according to disgruntled users registering their displeasure on Twitter. The south-west appears to be bearing the brunt of the network failure.
Vodafone explains in a forum post that the network problems are due to a break-in at an exchange centre in Basingstoke, "which resulted in damage done to some of our equipment". So it's a case of leaves on the line -- tea leaves, that is.
We're reminded of the scene in The Italian Job where Michael Caine throws his bike into a power station to cause a power cut and break into Turin's traffic-control centre. Perhaps this is just the start of a hilariously complex Ocean's Eleven-style caper!
Or perhaps the the world's largest mobile telecommunications company has been nobbled by a simple case of B&E. As many Tweeters are asking, where's the redundancy? Where's the backup? Where's the anti-burglary paint and the sign of a dog with "I live here" written on it?
Voice, texts and data are all affected, but Vodafone insists it's "working quickly" to get back to normal. Voda also assures customers there has been "no impact on the privacy of customers' data". That's reassuring.
The game of Chinese whispers that is Twitter also suggests that other companies using Vodafone's network have been affected, including Asda, Lebara and Talkmobile.
Are you a Vodafone customer? Is this a rare blip or just the latest problem? Has your phone had a case of the Mondays? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook wall.