They're already in their tents outside Best Buy for Black Friday
Some people just cannot help sleeping outside their favorite gadget stores in order to, um, buy a cheap TV. Why? For the fame? No, for the children.
This is the time of year when tradition kicks in and love wins.
This is the time when we all extend our arms to show gratitude for all we have.
It's also the time when some people extend their arms because they need to carry a cheap TV out of a store.
So in case you imagined that people have gotten tired of camping outside stores to secure their family's future (entertainment), may I take you to the Best Buy in Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio?
Outside its doors, the tents are pitched and the pitches for the righteousness of sleeping outside a Best Buy have begun.
As Fox 8 in Cleveland reports, those who have been there since Monday have behaved like this for some time.
In his third year is the No. 1 in line: Jonas Allooh. He is there to buy a TV. Which is odd, because he already has one in his tent -- as well as a microwave. I suppose you can never have enough TVs. He said he also might buy an Xbox.
Behind him is Tony Avitar. He's been doing this for 11 years. Yes, he can remember the days when all he had was a sleeping bag. Now, perhaps having saved so much money every Thanksgiving, he has a fancy tent.
Both these men enjoy families who take turns in keeping their places, while the men go off to perform basic ablutions. "You start to smell," explained Allooh.
Please don't think these people are crazy. Please also don't think they are besmirching the traditions of Thanksgiving. No, they won't miss their Thursday meal.
As Avitar told Fox 8: "We usually have Thanksgiving dinner brought to the tent, so we'll have a full spread in the tent, and it's kind of my time with [the kids]."
While you digest those words of love, I would encourage you to understand that Avitar, for one, doesn't really want to do this any more.
However, he explained: "I wanted to stop three or four years ago, and my kids make me do it because they like coming down."
Now thaton Thanksgiving perhaps the Avitars might do something revolutionary: shop first and have Thanksgiving dinner at home.
So you see, Americans are always short of entertainment. Sometimes, they have to go through enormous suffering to attain it.
And sometimes, the suffering is the entertainment.