The great Twitter 'text-your-parents-you're-a-drug-dealer' experiment
Nathan Fielder, star of "Nathan For You," asks his Twitter followers to text their moms and dads (accidentally) offering drugs. The reactions are various and, sometimes, hilarious.
Twitter might well be a repository for half-truths, halfwits, and even the half cut, but sometimes it has its uses.
One consists of trying to get your followers to provide some entertainment.
How can one not commend Nathan Fielder, star of Comedy Central's "Nathan For You," for creating art in action with the help merely of his followers, their phones, and their parents?
He took to Twitter and made a very simple request. He asked his followers to text their parents accidentally that they had drugs for sale and to screenshoot their reactions.
The text they were to send read: "Got 2 grams for $40." A price not to be sniffed at. They were then to offer an oopsie that the text had gone to the wrong recipient.
You will be moved to immediately disappear to the nearest fire escape for a tiramisu when I tell you that the replies wafted between naive charm and threats of harm.
As Splitsider reports, one fine mom offered: "2 grams of whaaaaAtttttt???????"
This was followed by: "What do you mean?? Now you're doing cocaine? Ganja? What?????"
Her conclusion: "God help me. And you." Which clearly showed the excessive self-centeredness of so many a parent.
One mom did manage to instinctively believe this was a joke. At least, she hoped it was. When her child turned the subject to the more important "Jeopardy," she acted as if nothing had occurred.
Of course, not all were so lenient. For example, this: "You piece of s***. Do you want to go back to jail?" Clearly, her child was not a first offender.
And then there were the parents who didn't quite grasp the language of Drug Nation.
This mom, for example: "Why did you send that? r u saying that you have money for grandmother."
Since when have grandmothers needed money from kids? We can but hope.
One mischievous child even managed to persuade his mom that "grams" was short for "grammar books." This kind and naive mother then asked if her child needed more money.
Strangely, the answer was yes.
For some parents -- fans of "Breaking Bad" and "Weeds," perhaps -- the mere notion of their offspring being off their druggy rocker was too much.
One dad immediately texted that he and his wife were paying their child a visit and would immediately drive him or her to rehab.
One mom threatened something more drastic and more final: "So help me god if you are referring to drugs I will disown you."
I've always worried about that word "disown."
Mom, you never owned your kid in the first place. His dealer does.