The cat with more than 500,000 Twitter followers
In a sign that the apocalypse may be closer than we think, here is Sockington, a cat who is half way to becoming the Shaq of cats. Or the Ashton Kutcher.
Rudy the Parrot hates him.
Last week, Rudy tweeted: "They can try but they will never get to me. Birds live twice as long as cats, sometimes longer. @Sockington will perish."
I am sure that is true. However, whereas in January Sockington had 10,000 Twitter followers, now there are more than 500,000. Rudy is stuck on 1,573.
Sockington is, as you have probably guessed, a cat. One extremely popular cat.
He is the cat that belongs to Jason Scott, a man with remarkable sideburns who is the brains behind, amongst other things, Textfiles.com. Sockington's home is Waltham, Mass., and from it he tweets about everything that is important to him. Kibble, for example. And, um, pillows.
Here is a sample Sockington tweet: "stalk stalk stalk AND WHAT HAVE WE HERE deadly pillow enemy BANZAIIIIIIIII CRASH oh no busted PILLOW ATTACKED FIRST run run run."
Sockington is very conscious of the large following he has built, but he is loyal to his own: "AGAIN I REMIND SOCKS ARMY am only following animal twitters BUT REST OF ARMY IS VERY AWESOME and I am rubbing against your legs now."
Sockington has had music written about him. And when someone told him he had already jumped the shark, Sockington replied, according to Mr. Scott in the video I have embedded for your permanent enjoyment and solace: "Awesome. I'm gonna eat that sucker for weeks."
It is foggy in the Bay Area today. And if your life is a little foggy too, surely Sockington's success can give you hope that anything, truly anything is possible in this odd little world.