Shock: Research says pot makes you lazy (but not psychotic)

Scientists in London conclude that smoking your favored leaf cools down your dopamine-synthesis skills. Their initial hypothesis was that pot contributed to psychosis, which they now doubt.

Has one theory gone up in smoke? Slate News Channel/YouTube Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

You are not going to bereefer this.

In fact, you might need to steady yourself by whatever means you normally choose to create a little peaceful comfort.

You see, a group of scientists have got together, studied the brains of pot smokers and decided that regular marijuanists have brains that enjoy deficiencies.

These, specifically, involve a stunted ability to synthesize dopamine, a little neurotransmitter which, when fed correctly, makes you want to start a company called Facebook, climb Kilimanjaro, or run the 100 meters in 8.2 seconds.

Yes, a blunt can blunt your need to succeed.

I am grateful to PopSci for spotting this revelatory research, which is published in the journal, Biological Psychiatry.

The scientists, all based in London, believed before the research that the drug would actually increase dopamine synthesis, as pot smoking had been linked to psychotic disorders.

Their conclusion is to "question the hypothesis that cannabis increases the risk of psychotic disorders by inducing the same dopaminergic alterations seen in schizophrenia."

The scientists examined the brains of regular pot smokers with a PET scan. All these subjects had, to some extent, shown symptoms of psychosis-type behaviors.

They found a correlation between increased pot smoking and a reduced dopamine-synthesis ability.

Naturally, the scientists don't feel they can offer proof of causality -- especially with such a small sample.

However, they believe their findings point to evidence that might have been perceived by one or two people over the last, say, 50 years: pot makes you relaxed, apathetic, indolent, reluctant, and perhaps even a touch chill.

I do wonder whether these results might spur the former Microsoft employee, Jamen Shively, who is deeply intent on creating the Starbucks of pot -- a worldwide chain that would put pot virtually on your doorstep. Yes, without a strange man on a bicycle knocking on your door.

One imagines the suggestion that pot isn't linked with psychosis might ease his path through certain health and safety standards that exist in so many countries.

Next week, we will be discussing how regular ingestion of beer and french fries correlates with IQ.

 

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