See doomsday's possible approach, streamed live
I know it's bad, but I want the symbolic clock to hit 11:58 p.m. Thursday so we can all sing the famous Iron Maiden song.
Now I don't want anyone to panic, but on Thursday, for the first time in two years, famous scienticians from the board of the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists will move the minute hand of the Doomsday Clock, which is perhaps the most bad-ass-named fake clock in the world after the "Timex of Space and Time" (which I just made up).
Nobody knows if the hand will move closer to the figurative midnight (which, apparently, causes all-out nuclear war or something equally destructive) or farther away (which I believe causes extinct species to come back to life). But you can watch it live via streaming media at 7 a.m. PST, otherwise known as "too early to care").
For those who don't follow events that could lead to the end of the world, the Doomsday Clock is a symbolic clock the aforementioned Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists has been manipulating since 1947. The clock monitors how near humanity is to catastrophic self-destruction--ostensibly, the closer the hands get to midnight the closer we are to total annihilation.
Originally, the clock was set to count down to atomic war. Now, though, it follows events more broadly, metaphorically ticking toward not just nuclear war but also environmental destruction, bioengineering disasters, zombie outbreaks, and Conan moving to 12:05.
The clock's Wikipedia page has a great rundown of the different times the hands have been moved and what times they've moved to. As you can see, your parents were almost destroyed by this evil, fake clock. I'll be watching at TurnBacktheClock.org on Thursday morning. Will you?