Politician moves to make vulgar Photoshopping illegal

A state lawmaker in Georgia is so perturbed that someone used Photoshop to put his head on a porn star's body that he now wants any kind of lewd Photoshopping to be banned. "No one has a right to make fun of anyone," he says.

That's "public" with an "l." Screenshot by Chris Matyszczyk/CNET

Sometimes people don't appreciate flattery.

They are so engrossed in their own grossly skewed view of the world that their sense of humor flies into the night like a married lover late home for dinner.

How else can one explain the quite bizarre intentions of Georgia state Rep. Earnest Smith?

He clearly sees a vast importance in being Earnest.

He clearly believes that his constituents are so drawn to his Earnestness that anything that deviates it from absolute Earnestness deserves the full metal force of the law.

Which is why he wants to make lewd, coarse, filthy Photoshopping illegal and punishable with a fine of $1,000.

You see, some devious, twisted human being placed His Earnestness's head on the body of a porn star. He did this for public consumption on the blog Georgia Politics Unfiltered. The porn star has a very nice body. He is a porn star, after all. And he is not Ron Jeremy.

The human being behind this affrontery has come forward. His name is Andre Walker. It is unknown if he was moved by the boast on His Earnestness's own Web site that says he is both "accessible" and "audacious."

However, Walker told Fox News: "The first Amendment to the Constitution of the United States protects all forms of speech, not just spoken word."

His Earnestness is undeterred by this almost pornographic argument.

He fulminated to Fox News: "No one has a right to make fun of anyone. It's not a First Amendment right."

If this turns out to be true, Technically Incorrect is operating under some very strange illusions.

Smith insists that he has legislation in his mind that will put a stop to all the appallingly imaginative filthmongers who are destroying society with this awful technology.

He isn't, to the naked eye, keen to disrobe the details of this legislation, explaining to Fox News: "I don't have to tell you anything."

It seems that Smith first had the idea last year in order to protect a girl who had been subject to some form of online bullying.

The idea then was to make it a misdemeanor to cause "an unknowing person wrongfully to be identified as the person in an obscene depiction."

Might Smith be now in doubt that there exists anyone who, on seeing this Photoshopped image of him as porn legend, would consider it to be, well, real?

His, he insists, is a higher cause.

"This is about being vulgar," he told Fox News. "We're becoming a nation of vulgar people."

Some might be concerned about his use of the word "becoming." Especially to Fox News.

 

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