As you tense your loins, waiting for the end of the world, those in charge at Instagram are squeezing other muscles. For rumors have emerged that the site's most popular user, Kim Kardashian, is considering shutting down her account and taking all of her pretty pictures with her.
Kardashian is, reportedly, appalled, sickened, nauseated, shocked and stunned to the core (I might be exaggerating some of these emotions) at Instagram's audaciously offensive policy changes.
Should you have been detained at an office party for the last few days, Instagram suddenly decided it could sell all your pictures without telling you (or giving you a cut), beforemore quickly than a unicyclist suddenly espying a non-fiscal cliff.
As TMZ would have it -- and TMZ normally has it perfectly -- Kardashian is still not convinced that Instagram won't cheat her out of her healthily-gotten gains.
Kardashian's art is her art, to be shared with her followers and the world at large, but not to be profited from by spotty little boys who think they're terribly clever.
At the time of writing, her account is adorned by 825 photos. She enjoys 5,742,906 followers. Unlike Instagram and its pale big brother Facebook, Kimmy inspires devotion. Her committed acolytes would follow her to the end of the world.
Consider her latest image of sparkly gold shoes. It inspires reactions such as "Wowzers those are sick."
When have Instagram or Facebook ever inspired such emotions?
Should Kimmy decide to stay, every Instagram member should use her as their personal lodestar. If Instagram ever tries such creepy, sniveling money-grabbing again, one word from La Kardashian and everyone will be gone.
If there's one thing we know about Kim Kardashian, it's that she uses her power wisely.