Intellectual posts his 130 mph freeway race online
Benjamin Ryan is so pleased with the performance of his VW Golf that he posts film of him racing it at 130 mph on the freeway online. He is banned from driving for 15 months when someone notices his antics.
I know people will do anything online these days.
But it is hard not to rubber-neck when someone does something so astonishingly witless that even your serially drunken aunt wouldn't do it at Christmas dinner.
Please consider the curious case of Benjamin Ryan.
He gets himself a VW Golf. He has it tweaked for maximum torque. Then he goes a little torque mad. He decides to race a friend of his along a freeway, his friend being the proud owner of an Audi RS4. They travel at speeds that touch 130 mph.
It so happens that another friend rides shotgun with him on this torque-mad sprint. This friend has a cell phone. The kind of cell phone that makes video.
Benjamin, whose heart clearly pounds to a different beat, loves the video so much that, oh, you'll never guess. Yes, he posts it on an online forum.
"Look at me," he seems to say. "I'm a very driven intellectual."
You know that it's hard to have complete faith in humanity? Well, someone on the forum decides that Benjy is a menace to society, tips off the police and, with appropriate speed, a court fines Benjamin 400 British pounds and bans him from driving for 15 months.
Your eyes may aquaplane a little at discovering that his lawyer, Mark McNeil, suggested that Benjamin did check to see if the road was clear before embarking upon his daytime Daytona along the A46 in Lincolnshire, England.
He added: "It was never Mr. Ryan's intention to encourage or incite other road users to follow his actions and race on roads." Something that was heartily proven by his action of posting the video of his toupee-raising antics online.
You know these stories always have a sad ending. Yes, Benjamin actually lost the race.