Summers are famous for slow news cycles so I had some time recently to shop online at KlearGear.com.
During my visit, a single thought flashed in my mind: "Devil stay behind me. I could drop plenty in this Web store."
Who wouldn't want to rain some rubber-band hurt on cubicle mates with a rapid fire rubber-band gun? Repel unwanted co-workers with a computer-controlled, foam-missile launcher.
I laughed out loud when I saw the Relativity Watch. The numbers on the face rotate with each passing second.
I can't wait to get my hands on the tiny TV Keychain Remote Control. KlearGear asserts that the $4.99 gadget can control any television. Next time I'm in a bar and the patrons drink themselves deaf, I'll covertly crank down the TV.
As for jazzing up my cubicle, I think the $89 Floating Ideas Levitating desk globe is just what my work station needs. The sphere is suspended in air by an electromagnetic field. Cool.
When it comes to decorating, I'll admit I have schlock taste. That's probably why I tarried too long on the wastebasket emblazoned with the skull and crossbones--an obvious nod to the file-sharing crowd--and the Star Trek voice operated light dimmer, the one that responds to commands in the voice of the Federated computer.
KlearGear even sells nerd ties. If ties ever make a comeback in Silicon Valley, you might try a print of a computer circuit board. In tech circles, such a garment could pass as haute couture.