If you travel around the world, you sometimes find yourself marveling at just how many different cultures can intersperse every second word with an expletive.
It's a talent that some might say the British have turned into something resembling an art form, as long as you have a refined interpretation of what constitutes art.
I am therefore expleting with joy that an English city has been named, by the politically correct techies at Foursquare, as the world's rudest.
How did Foursquare come to this conclusion? Well, in a post on the the company's engineering blog, Matthew Rathbone, an engineer who describes himself as a "proud British midlander" (this may be a first), explained that Foursquare is looking to make sense of all the data it has at its disposal.
In this example, he looked at all the world's English-speaking cities. (Glasgow was out, then.) He analyzed which of them featured Foursquare tips including words that might not be welcome at a place of worship.
The northern English city of Manchester flew to the top of the table, as if it were borne on cursed wings.
If you have not been to Manchester, it is often cold and even more often wet. Its most well-known icon is no longer the ruder of the two Gallagher brothers from Oasis, but the Manchester United soccer player Wayne Rooney.
Rooney tends to feature in veritably Greek tragedies concerning grandmother prostitutes and public urination.
However, beneath its forked exterior, Manchester does enjoy an elevated cultural heart. Please consider that the city clearly enjoys many people who participate in Foursquare. What could be more cultural than that?
You will be wondering which city came second. Please bow and scrape to El Paso, Texas, which wasn't far behind Manchester in words you'd rather leave behind.
Strangely, Pittsburgh, a town where they really do have good reason to curse at all hours of the day, only came a slightly distant third, followed by Bloomington, In., (surely you won't blame Bobby Knight--he left years ago) and Riverside, Calif.
Some might wonder whether any avowedly tech cities managed to make an appearance. Well, if you look at the chart, you will see San Jose, Calif., crawling along the sidewalk into eleventh place.
Still, San Jose simply has nothing on Manchester. British news organizations offered their own interpretations of Manchester's blessed supremacy. Metro.co.uk, for example, suggested: "We can only assume that it's lots of people saying things like 'try the f***ing lamb' or 'the mojitos are the the t**s."
So, you see, this isn't swearing. This is enthusiasm. Those who live in Manchester are simply incapable of curbing theirs. When you live in a place like Manchester, it's hard not to reach for spontaneously excessive glee when you find something that is actually above average.