Apple: Steve Jobs is no ninja star smuggler

Apple says a widely reported claim by a Japanese magazine--that its CEO had ninja throwing stars in his carry-on luggage--is "pure fiction."

Perhaps there are many of you who keep ninja throwing stars beneath your pillows in order to be prepared for unexpected intruders.

I won't ask where or when you obtained them, but I will tell you that a strange, already refuted allegation has emerged from Japan that Apple CEO Steve Jobs attempted to bring some of these stars back with him after a recent trip to that lovely country.

Among other related news accounts, Bloomberg cites a report from the Japanese tabloid SPA, saying Jobs was detained while attempting to board his private plane. An official reportedly discovered these throwing stars (which do, sometimes, conveniently come in packs of 12 for those with many enemies) in Jobs' carry-on luggage.

Ninja star smuggler? Really? CC Whatcounts/Flickr

The SPA story says an argument reportedly ensued, one in which Jobs not only claimed he was hardly likely to hijack his own plane, but also that he would never return to Japan again.

An Apple representative, however, has issued a statement denying such claims: "Steve did visit Japan this summer for a vacation in Kyoto, but the incidents described at the airport are pure fiction. Steve had a great time and hopes to visit Japan again soon."

I will leave you to imagine whether any of the information in the SPA report resembles fact. Might the Apple CEO have needed the stars for an upcoming presentation? Might SPA have had some trouble getting its iPad app approved? Might a new iPhone 5 prototype be equipped with ninja stars that pop out of the case, remote-controlled, and slice the hand of any miscreant who might pick it up in a bar?

One can only hope that all of SPA's description was, indeed, fiction. Just as one can only wonder whether SPA will attempt to prove its troubling assertions. What might it throw at the Apple CEO next?

 

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