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"LADIES USE THE URINAL with a MAGIC CONE"

by lylesg / November 20, 2004 11:30 AM PST

Some may consider this a bit graphic--BEWARE!

Magic Cone

LOL

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Re:
by MarciaB / November 20, 2004 11:51 AM PST
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(NT) (NT) I'm not clicking, you can't make me! ! !
by Dan McC / November 20, 2004 12:59 PM PST
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(NT) (NT) chicken ;)
by MarciaB / November 20, 2004 9:54 PM PST
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How about a unisex toilet?
by Steven Haninger / November 20, 2004 10:32 PM PST

It could be articulated in such a way to change its angle by pressing a button. This would tip the bowl and change the water level for the suited purpose. You could choose;

1.---M/F
2.---Stand/Sit
3.---#1/#2
4.---Surprize Me!
Happy

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Re: How about a unisex toilet?
by Diane Harrison / November 21, 2004 1:24 AM PST

Oh no, horrible memories! We had #4 - the Surprise Me option at work for years I think. All the men had to do to assure women never advanced in the office was to schedule important meetings after lunch, and offer the ladies a couple of cups of coffee or iced tea shortly before the meetings.

When the main office building at my work was first built (late 1800's), it was the humane society building. They had few women to cater to, so they didn't change things until about the 1930's I guess. Then some fool decided to put bidets in the women's bathrooms. For those of you who don't know what a bidet is, it is a toilet bowl you straddle, standing over it facing the back wall, while trying to balance and attend to your call of nature. When you are done and press the lever, it jets up a mighty splash of water aimed supposedly at your regions the Magic Cone would cover (billed as a cleaner method of self-maintenance and they don't provide t.p. as an alternative in those stalls anyway).

I can only conlude that the women in the 1930's were very short, bow-legged, never wore high heels, didn't carry purses, were all budding gymnasts and wore enough layers of skirts to the floor to be able to hide the fact that every bit of them from the waist down is now soaking wet with no way of remedying that fact. To understand the reality of how the bidets worked, think of the most ornery water fountain you've ever tried to get a drink from. Yes, that one when you lean over and try to turn it on, it just trickles water so low, you have to get practically on top of the spigot to get a drink. Then, as soon as you've been silly enough to get close to it, it sprays you full force all over your face and hair and down the front of your shirt.

Somehow, where a fitted silk suit with a form-fitting skirt and high heels simply does not work at all with these idiot contraptions unles you pull lower apparel up in the air until you resemble a buttercup flower. Keep in mind that the office has a rule that all women MUST wear nylons (which means panythose for almost all women), so you have to completely remove at least one leg of the hose (as well as all panties) while grasping the other trailing leg of hose, before even attempting to perform these feats of physical agility. To add insult to injury, there was no hook for a purse in those stalls, so you got extra agility points if the contents of your purse didn't spill into the basin while you were fighting for balance, or get filled with water when the thing belched out the water.

Enough of us got completely soaked to where it looked like we fell into a horse trough, and they took to leaving a hairdryer in the bathroom to rememdy the damage. They finally removed those in favor of convention toilet fixtures a few years ago. I'd far rather use the men's room than deal with getting soaked for hours afterwards. I am only grateful that the government didn't have any money to get those "magic eyes" that some of the bathrooms have. that flush for you when they sense any movement, whether it is the right time or not!

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(NT) (NT) Dan'l & Ms. Boone had it good..No tech., no problems.
by Steven Haninger / November 21, 2004 1:40 AM PST
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(NT) (NT) LOL I am rolling--too funny!
by lylesg / November 21, 2004 8:03 AM PST
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(NT) (NT) Re: Whatever works in a pinch is OK with me
by MKay / November 20, 2004 11:58 PM PST
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(NT) (NT) Ha, Ha ROTFL. My. My , My, nevermind...
by Rolway / November 21, 2004 1:04 AM PST
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Re:
by Chorus-Line A1-QMS / November 21, 2004 5:19 AM PST

Some may consider this a bit graphic--BEWARE!
Magic Cone
LOL
Posted by: mojo


=========================

A bit graphic--Beware!?!?!
Well, hmmmm nothing more graphic and time consuming than have to wash your hands first before parting the labia to make sure the cone fit exactly in its proper place otherwise the urine will just drip down your thighs and the whole mess and work you have to go through to clean up.

If the argument here is a dirty seat cover - then why not squat or step up on it, sit and pee. If an individual is obese, this suggestion may not be very convenient --- yah magic coney to the rescue.

Other alternative such as always have a handy anti-bacterial wet wipes or a small bottle of PURELL hand sanitizer liquid handy to clean the seat.

Magic cone -- I don't see much benefit in using it unless one have a back problem, boils or painful open wounds on their butt cheeks, severe hemorrhoidal problem, and some type of cervical problem that will limit the ability to sit comfortably but gee I would think the doctor would have suggested a catheter and I know that it comes in various styles and designs convenient enough wherein no one will know you got one hook up. Wink
:
:
:

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Re:Good Grief
by Rolway / November 21, 2004 5:38 AM PST
In reply to: Re:

Sure glad I'm a male. All I have to watch out for is the zipper.

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Re:Good Grief
by Chorus-Line A1-QMS / November 21, 2004 6:21 AM PST
In reply to: Re:Good Grief

Sure glad I'm a male. All I have to watch out for is the zipper.

Posted by: G. Rolway
====================


That is indeed a worry when one does not wear briefs or boxer shorts. It also depends how *it* is positioned, if it is down then it will catch the P-hair, if it is up then it will catch the skin of the person's *thingy*. Happy

If one wears briefs or boxers shorts, then the zipper will catch the cloth material first and unlikely that it will catch the *thingy*.

Well don't laugh folks thinking this is way too graphic because it is important for parents to check and teach their young boys to operate with caution when USING ZIPPERS --- young girls too.

I would think for safety reasons, pants designs for young boys and girls should be either elastic waist or buttons.


.

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?
by Angeline Booher / November 21, 2004 7:42 AM PST

As there are no urinals in restrooms for ladies, does this device give us permission to use one in the restroom for the males?

Sure would be nice not to have to stand in line so very long. There's never a line at the mens room!

Happy

Angeline
click here to email semods4@yahoo.com

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Yeah, I know Angeline, but check the next post
by Ziks511 / November 21, 2004 10:48 AM PST
In reply to: ?

there are some things worth waiting for, and a reasonably fresh smelling bathroom is one of them. I'd suggest lobbying for building codes requiring twice as much room for women's as for men's washrooms. Sometimes there's a reason for inequality.

Rob Boyter

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You obviously haven't been in too many ...
by Evie / November 21, 2004 9:23 PM PST

... public ladies rooms. Yeah, the "lounges" in Macy's are pretty puff, but at the McD's off the highway it's no picnic. Probably enhanced by the fact that it is usually Moms that take children with gastrointestinal distress to the ladies room.

It's nice that many of the rest rooms now have the "gaskets" -- I have a couple of these in my purse now for the occasions where they don't. My knees are getting too old for doing "the hover" anymore Wink

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(NT) (NT) What's a "gasket"?
by Diane Harrison / November 21, 2004 11:43 PM PST
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WHY ??? And does this mean that women's toilets will begin
by Ziks511 / November 21, 2004 10:44 AM PST

to smell as bad as men's do owing to potential inaccuracy and inattention? Or is it all due to our hormones? Since I'm sort of laid up at home for the last few months I've been doing some (not really enough) of the housework, and men, I'm here to tell you: Cleaning the toilet in a household with 2 men and 1 woman is an unpleasantly smelly task. Be attentive, clean up after yourself and PEE SITTING DOWN !!! That way it all goes where it should and there's no backsplash. I was revolted !!! and I used to think my wife was being overly sensitive.

Mea and my gender Culpa

Rob Boyter

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LOL - a hearty thank you from all females!!!
by Diane Harrison / November 21, 2004 10:59 AM PST

Yes, that is truly one of those moments of simmerimg resentment when it comes time to clean up such a mess. I am very fortunate to have highly civilized persons living on a full time basis at home - none of that nonsense. But when we have others over, apparently the theory is that peeing is like horseshoes - anywhere within a few feet of the ring is close enough. NOT!!!!

I'm not sure it's hormonal, since the kitty cats could beat any of you guys any day of the week, but it sure is disgusting! I have found those wonderful plastic containers of disinfectant wipes (Clorox and other types like Lysol), and I leave them prominently available for guests to use in case of emergency - oh, okay - in case of ill manners! The only problem is that those with poor manners (and aim) are also the ones who won't think about doing cleanup either.

The day I walked into the guest bath, and found out that my shoes made velcro type of noises when I lifted my feet off the floor, I decided there should be a new section in the Penal Code allowing an exception for great bodily injury to be done to anyone crass enough to create a situation like that (and that happened in the space of four hours!). Worse yet, the mental impression you are left with of that person or those persons, is that they also likely didn't wash their hands either. Even with women, if I see someone walk out of the ladies' room without washing their hands, my opinion of them ends up changing - and not for the better.

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Good point, and another reason
by Steven Haninger / November 21, 2004 11:21 AM PST

Wearing shorts while urinating standing up is a problem that women cannot know about. This is when it's revealed to a guy that not all of it goes into the bowl. So why does it feel like there's a slight drizzle on your legs? Could that drizzle be...don't want to know! Shocked

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Thanks guys. There are so many stories in the Naked City
by Ziks511 / November 21, 2004 9:12 PM PST

and these are but three of them. This is not defense Diane, there is no defense for being that bad mannered, but part of the problem is splash back; when one pees into an open bowl of water from a height the same thing occurs as when you pour water from 3 and a half feet into a rounded container. It splashes everywhere, and in most of our white bathrooms the little water/pee droplets don't show up well unless you bend over. Nobody, at least no male, voluntarily bends over in showers or bathrooms. It's a self protection thing.

I base my thoughts on hormonal levels on two things experience with male and female cats (males smell much worse) and the fact that things in the bathroom got worse when my son hit puberty. Perhaps I was sort of accustomed to my own aroma (and to which Nancy had taken exception long before) but when my son hit 14, Whoa Nelly. Nancy said it was worse but not that much worse so there we are, guilty as charged. I haven't figured out how often is often enough to clean but past 3 days you're in trouble so its probably every 2 days. I applaud the disposable/ discardable brush idea though if the bowl brush sits in bleach there's nothing to fear but a spill.

Anyway that's my 2 cents for today

Rob Boyter

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