TV with DVR & Internet: $84.90/moThe 404 373: Where we announce the worst movie of the summer
I'll ruin the surprise for you right now: the worst movie of the summer (only four days in so far) is "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen." On today's show, we rip apart this atrocity even more, spoiler-free! Wilson also gives us his first impressions of his brand new Apple iPhone 3GS and discovers the weirdest camera issue ever. I love you, Wilson, but that came out of NOWHERE!
So I finally broke down and saw "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen" last night, and although I can't give away too many plot details, suffice it to say that I'm throwing in my vote for it being the WORST movie of the summer. Sure, summer blockbusters are supposed to be silly and entertaining, but a truckload of physical humor and irritating little side-stories ruined what could have been an awesome action movie. Where are the Transformers fanboys on this one? This betrayal feels like that "Spiderman 3" abomination all over again! Apart from the movie being about an hour too long (2.5 hours total, say whaaatt?), the only parts worth watching are the epic fight scenes and Megan Fox jumping/running/screaming/rolling through explosions. We also address that whole racist robot plot point yet again--now that I've actually seen the movie, I wouldn't say that characters are straight-up racist, but the gold tooth and excessive slang are definitely in poor taste and an unnecessarily stereotypical slight at hip-hop. Listen in for more details.
The next story is about gaming company Global Gaming Factory X resurrecting The Pirate Bay as a legal file-distro site. After a bit of confusion about how exactly that whole case ended, we're still left wondering why companies keep trying to cannibalize on the success of dead P2P sites, relying on the name alone to tread water and maybe even gain a few new subscribers. The problem is that it never works! Napster, anyone? Who's idea was that, anyway? "Hey guys, let's buy this dead service that still exists only to bait people into RIAA lawsuits and relaunch the site with legit, paid content. It's all about brand confidence, right?" Good luck with that, doods.
Finally, we're announcing BIG changes on the show tomorrow including the triumphant debut of our new logo (based on Blake Stevenson's winning design) and a few surprises to go along with it! We're also excited to have Brendt Barbur of the Bicycle Film Festival as our guest on tomorrow's show. Check it out LIVE tomorrow @ 11AM ET at CNET Live.
EPISODE 373
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Justin Yu covers desktop computers, printers, and peripherals for CNET. When he's not scouring eBay for useless ephemera or eating hot dogs for breakfast, he spends his time making fun of Internet culture every morning on The 404 podcast. E-mail Justin.
Wilson Tang is an associate producer for CNET TV. He's a part-time artist and filmmaker and has written and directed several films. He likes long walks on the beach and girls.
Jeff Bakalar is an editor for CNET Reviews, getting all the dirt on the gaming industry. After spending a few years in the world of film production, he has settled down and currently lives in New Jersey. He's an avid writer, gamer, and full-time pessimist.
Justin Yu can be found tinkering with printers and other peripherals for CNET, when he's not adjusting his headphones, riding his bike, or eating hot dogs for breakfast.
I love Transofrmers, and I even enjoy the transformer parts in this movie (except when they're trying to be funny), what I don't like is how insane he went in every other direction.
It's definitely not just you who liked this movie, and that's the entire reason why it's important that we tear it down. It shouldn't be alright to like this kind of...stuff. I'm pretty sure we can all agree that the American Box Office chart isn't the best place to look to when you're trying to find quality.
The entire thing was confusing, long and so full of plot wholes that I even lost count. I suspect that as the word spreads the movie won't do as good this coming weekend.
Like somebody else said: "Is like watching paint dry while getting hit on the head with a frying pan".
1) the first movie was a big hit
2) school's out
And jeff really put me off with his hatorade yesterday even if he didnt mean it.
justin
What was BAD was the storytelling. There was no reason to watch the characters, no motivations, no worthy arcs, no stakes whatsoever. They spent the last two hours trying to bring Optimus back to save the world? There was never a good reason WHY? Even the characters are saying they don't know why they are doing it.
The pacing in the middle hour of the movie was just awful. They just spent hours/days wandering around in the desert?!?! ***? And the whole trick ending when Sam pretends to "die"... yeah... sure... like we were ever going to believe the lead character in the main series either Optimus or Sam were going to die. Or were we ever going to find it credible that Sam couldn't tell Mikeala that he loved her. She's EFFING Megan Fox.
Bad jokes in the movie aside, it was just poor storytelling. Plain and simple: characters make choices and have to pay for the consequences of them. Not wander around aimlessly listening to what other people do and then reacting to it. This happened in the first film. Sam was a strong character up until the ending of the first movie when the choices he made were inane and the goal didn't make any sense.
And I loved seeing the robots transform and battle it out as much as anyone else. But 1) out of all the newest characters we're introduced to why do we have to spend the most screen time with the two most annoying ones who transformed into a beatdown ice cream truck or a freakin' Chevy... beyond the racism. 2) Nobody gave a crap when they fought because we spend any time with the characters before they fought. We had no empathy for them. It was just eye-candy without any meaning. I mean we could have just watched two nameless machines fight it out instead of watching two hours where Sam just wanders around the effing dessert. And did it only bother me that almost every single Decepticon look the same? Or that the ending fight with the Fallen was all over 30 seconds long? I thought the Fallen was suppose to be bad ass. And how does one Prime beat the Fallen when the other 13 couldn't?
I know we're suppose to turn our brains off for these movies, but I disagree with people who think a movie can be as dumb as they want. Look at Terminator 2. One of the best action films of all time. 15 years later, it's still good, the effects are good, and the characters are good. They make real choices and deal with real consequences, so when things happen like the Terminator sacrificing himself at the end, really move you/entertain you.
Yes, there are far worse movies out there. But they didn't cost 200 million dollars to make and had a team of some of the most talented people in Hollywood working on them.
but all kidding aside, as much as i agree with wilson on most of his points, you really had to have kept expectations low for this movie, even before the initial reviews came out. a few points on why:
1. it's a michael bay movie. the guy is practically the king for making huge budget movies that require the IQ of a potato to understand. in fact, it's prob. best if you minimize on the thinking to enjoy his movies, which are all pretty much about explosions, hot girls, and minimal plot logic/cohesion): e.g. bad boys, armageddon, pearl harbor, the texas chainsaw massacre... need i say more?
2. the trailer itself should've been a pretty big indicator to where the movie was going. megan fox in her short shorts in slow mo, the transformers acting as comic relief... wait did i just sum up the entire movie?
3. the movie's clearly made for teenage boys. to expect anything else is just... well, u're just asking to be disappointed.
anyways, i'm not so much defending the movie as saying, given the people behind it, it's no surprise that we ended up with something like this. perhaps if j.j. abrams or christopher nolan directed it, we would've ended up with something different. but then again, we could've had joel schumacher and transformer nipples... o_O
it's def. a shame that the movie didn't excel in the way i think many of us hoped that it would. in fact, many of us might have been insulted watching our favorite childhood characters dumbed down with gold teeth and illiteracy. but what's sadder is that the huge box office earnings from the movie only reinforces the message to hollywood that at the end of the day, a successful movie does not require it being a "good" movie.
...oh, it's an action film? My bad! What a horrible movie! Completely agree with Wilson Tang! Although, I'd like to see more Arcee.
Btw, did anyone notice the Decepticon symbol and then say "suck my popsicle" on the ice cream truck in the beginning?
-because the other 13 were out numbered in that civil war they had in cybertron. But 1) out of all the newest characters we're introduced to why do we have to spend the most screen time with the two most annoying ones who transformed into a beatdown ice cream truck or a freakin' Chevy... beyond the racism. 2) Nobody gave a crap when they fought because we spend any time with the characters before they fought. We had no empathy for them. It was just eye-candy without any meaning. I mean we could have just watched two nameless machines fight it out instead of watching two hours where Sam just wanders around the effing dessert. 1),2): They probably thought poeple would find them funny not racist "Or were we ever going to find it credible that Sam couldn't tell Mikeala that he loved her. She's EFFING Megan Fox."
-does it really matter?
i watched this movie for free through my gf's hook-ups at mtv and still felt a bit disappointed. sure, it's more or less a shoot-em-up action flick but i don't think that's an excuse for all the plot holes and silliness that went into it. i didn't go into the theater expecting something elaborately genius but at least something that built up a little more on the first movie with a bit more creativity in the story. but instead i was pretty much served a plate a stupid and ***'s. with this said, the action and CG was great and pretty much the only things in the movie worth watching.
r_tadlock, i think much of the reason for transformer 2's success so far is because it's just one of those movies that, if you were planning to see it, you would see it no matter how much people bashed it. if i hadn't seen yet but had still heard all of the negative comments, i'd still go see it.
my 2¢
I enjoyed the movie because it was well made!!!
Also, after reading the rest of the comments, I can see how people would be disappointed with the movie and maybe my comment was a little knee jerk.
--Rob
answers to your questions (part 1)
1) hey, a lot of people will take the dough just to shut up. They probably discredited jon voight. And hey, its been 2 years since the first encounter, thus became internet rumor.
2) talk about paying attention, they cant use the piece of allspark that sam had because they need to revive Jetfire(the SR-71 blackbird, ok pay attention now *******!), he is the only one who can read/translate the symbols (optimus cannot) and can help them lead to the tomb of the primes (where the matrix is located). Now, if they used it to revive optimus prime (and im sure they wouldnt hesitate), then they wouldnt be able to find the matrix and the energon machine (sun-energy absorbing machine). The fallen knows where the machine is but its only a matter of time for him to find the matrix. Sam's/autobots' enemy was time. Its as simple as that!
3) You got this one right, the 6th robot was the "doctor". And yes, you can detect a small object the size of that "decepticon doc". Have you ever heard of sonar equipment that people use when they are fishing (sport fishing, recreational fishing)? Yeah, they use those to track fish! Thats the civilian counter part. What the navy was using was a military grade, so you get the idea, right? I'll forgive you on this one, since you are not the type of person who is familiar with sonar technology.
4) I believe michael bay intended to do that so he could be identified by the audience as "the doctor" in a humorous way. "Couldn't he just get his eyes adjusted? You'd think with all the laser guns, someone could perform a Lasik procedure." I can see that you're taking this movie way too seriously.
5) Decepticons/Autobots obviously have nano-based technology (nano means 1 billionth of a meter or 1 millionth of a millimeter). An average size for a human cell is 10 micrometer which is a lot larger than a nanometer (consult your metric system please!). That means it can imitate human structures, color etc. at a nano level (pretty much every cell types). What now? You're wondering how it feels like to touch a decepticon's ass?
There is a reason why they call them transformers you F*&(*^ moron!! So a human or a robot wont be able to detect them! "Robots in disguise" listen to the cartoon theme song.
Bumblebee damaged his voice modulator upon entry to our planet (T1) maybe it wasnt completely fixed? buddy you're nitpicking, just stay with your chic flick movies.
answers to your questions (part 2)
6) Wow, you really have a mind of 4-year old. You are like" where did my sister come from?", "what is sex?", Wait a minute, you are just plain retarded! Being a prime descendant doesn't necessarily mean he came from a robot mother (or went through the whole pregnancy thing) , they came from the same machine that created the primes!
The primes couldnt gang up on him because he was too strong. Were you even awake during the movie? The REMAINING Primes sacrificed themselves fusing their bodies to contain the matrix. That means the primes lost the battle to the fallen's army, F$%#@ idiot!! Primes have exceptional fighting skills thats what makes optimus special. Thats why the fallen is afraid of him.
optimus was dealing with 3 decepticons when megatron stabbed him from behind.
Its not just Jetfire's creeky parts, but they merged him with his life force(energon), too. Thats what made him stronger. I can see that you have not seen the original cartoon transformers.
7) Again, NITPICKING! i've never been to the smithsonian museum but i know for a fact that old planes are gutted, refurbished, repainted before displaying them in a museum. It was obvious it was a military plane graveyard.
8) YES they can, especially at 130-150mph. there is no traffic on the desert, right? maybe a couple of camels.
Matt, Matt, Matt, lack of knowledge in military weaponry. Railguns really do exist. In fact, US NAVY has several working prototypes. Railguns can easily cover 250 miles, compared to gas expansion based (regular guns mounted on a destroyer/battleship) projectile which has 50-mile distance limit. Its projectile can travel as fast as 15000 feet/second. Giza is 80miles inland you said? So the railgun projectile would reach Devastator in about 28-29 seconds? Moving target you said? not a problem, you can fire different kinds of railgun projectiles regular ones and satellite or laser guided ones. BUT heres the thing ******* (im sorry i cant help it, you really are a dumb person), John Turturro was talking to the Captain of an AIRCRAFT CARRIER! The Destroyer (which is a smaller ship) that was carrying the railgun was already in the Nile river which is what, less than a mile from Giza! It was the DESTROYER that was tracking and targeting Devastator!
Turturro wasnt using a walkie-talkie he was using a satellite linked phone. His phone was either a dedicated satellite linked phone or linked to a ground-based satellite signal receiver/transmitter which was with tyrese, josh and the rest of the military personnel! Oh my God! How stupid and ignorant are you?
9) He didnt exactly go to heaven or robot heaven, the matrix was trying to get in touch with Sam while he was unconscious (i think). The primes are mystical ancient robots, who knows what they are capable of.
10) Where does Sam's bandage come from? WHEN JETFIRE TELEPORTED THEM. What about his extra sock? WHY THE F@#$ DO YOU CARE? DO YOU HAVE SOCK FETISH ? Why does Sam's roommate not contribute anything at all? JUST LIKE YOU. What was the Fallen doing for those thousands of years Megatron was frozen in ice? LOOKING FOR EARTH? I DONT KNOW, JACKIN OFF? How does one satellite receive transmissions from everywhere on the planet? BECAUSE MOST SATELLITES ARE LINKED TOGETHER MORON! ESPECIALLY MILITARY ONES! THERES HUNDREDS OF THEM IN THE OUTER SPACE ORBITING THE PLANET! Why does Wheelie hump Mikaela's leg? ASK WHEELIE. Why do we have to see John Turturro's thong? YOU LOVE IT, HUH? Why are robots who join together to become Devastator also seen fighting the Army at the same time? THOSE WERE DIFFERENT ONES Why does the government want only our military fighting Decepticons when our weapons seem unable to make so much as a dent on any of them? WE ARE CAPABLE OF DESTROYING THEM, JDAMS, TANK PROJECTILES, and CANNONS dont forget the RAILGUN!. Why did the ancient Egyptians build a pyramid around the sun-destroying machines instead of just breaking it? JESUS!!! Why is the Matrix of Leadership bigger in the Fallen's hand than in Sam's? MOTHER OF GOD.. And how do Mikaela's pants stay so clean? THAT EXPLAINS WHY YOU DIDNT UNDERSTAND THE MOVIE.
MATT DANIELS, dont act as if you're a smart guy, and quit trying. Most of your questions can be answered by a 5th grader, honestly. And you really need to see the movie several times, its obvious you missed a lot of things. How REALISTIC do you want a SCI-FI MOVIE just to satisfy your pea-sized brain? IT'S a SCIENCE FICTION MOVIE, *******!!! Do me a favor, stick with your chic flicks.
For anyone you wants an excellent review watch the Totally Rad Show's: http://revision3.com/trs/liftupable
Wilson needs to learn to not speak out of his ass and actually think about what he says. nuff sed.
Still love the show. I <3 you guys.
i also don't remember saying that anyone was a (whatever) for loving it...can you clarify? if i did, i apologize. but seriously, i don't remember calling anyone names for liking the movie.
I dunno what I was saying, and I just wish Cnet had the ability to edit posts. I didn't mean to come off as someone who just recommended someone else's review and opinions over yours... I kind of regret posting that stuff. I was just kind of pissed me off that you and Wilson were saying that it was the Worst movie of the summer (which is completely fine as it is your opinion) ... and then Jeff jumped on the train with you guys to never see it even if it went onto HBO. What kind of set me off even more was Wilson's post..."there are far worse movies out there. But they didn't cost 200 million dollars to make", There was no reason to watch the characters, no motivations, no worthy arcs, no stakes whatsoever."
When I was saying Wilson speaks without thinking, this is what I meant: No reason to watch the characters? If you were to watch Sam's Mom and Dad----at the beginning of the movie Sam's Dad was quick to let his son off to college while his mom was crying and sobbing. Now, at the end, those 2 acts were swapped. Sam's Mom knew that Sam had to go resurrect Optimus while his dad struggled to let him go. This is the exact opposite of the beginning of the movie. These characters /had/ similarities and differences. They /had/ personilities. This /was/ a story. He just failed to actually pay attention to the minute details. (and many have, not just Wilson in particular)
And for the "like we were ever going to believe the lead character in the main series either Optimus or Sam were going to die" --- you haven't seen I am Legend? Haven't Read a Shakespearean Play like Romeo and Juliet or Hamlet? It's a story. Each story has a ?Universe? of it?s own. You do not argue with that universe. Do you argue with Mission Impossible?s or James Bond?s? Some how when the building is about to explode, the character jumps right in time to land in a car to drive away safely. No one complains about that.
That's what I meant----things like that. I do have more to say, but this topic needs to drop?
Well, with that said, if I have offended you, Justin, I apologize. I think I may have put word in you mouth as well. It was just the moment. I don't apologize to just you Justin; if I have offended Jeff or Wilson...I truly am sorry. I really did not mean to call your review or this episode or this show **** or recommend the whatever show's review over yours. It was just the above things and more that set me off and they sort of offended me. Like I said, I still love the show and will continue to do.
Peace?
Whoa, buddy, intelligent? I didn't think I need to explain much more beyond the gold tooth and jive talk to get across the racism in the movie. And like I said during the show, the writers themselves can't even back that part up. But if you want me to break down the film point by point in a critical analysis I can do that too. I've written coverage for scripts before.
I don't regret saying that Transformers 2 is bad a film. And yes, I was paying attention to the character arcs in the film. The mother/father arc with his son was just terrible, because it made no sense. His father doesn't mind him going to college, but then at the end when he's pleading with his son not to go by himself? That's NOT an arc. There's an effing huge war/battle going around him. It's not a character change to not want their son to run into the battle by himself. What's the lesson? What's the actual, meaningful change? That you should want your son to stay at home more than go to college, but if there is an alien war going on you should let him go?
If you REALLY want to break down story points, then why the eff does Mikeala say, "I love you" rather than Sam. She wasn't the one who had the problem with it. He didn't change at all. ARCs involve CHANGE. Nothing changed about these characters.
My final 2 cents on the matter. Transformers 2 is a terrible story. But if you just want to watch junk exploded for no reason and robots battle for no particular reason go see it.
If you have time this summer, check out Up, or The Hangover, or The Hurt Locker, Star Trek, or 500 Days of Summer.
We cool, bro? Peace.
anyway, i encourage everyone to listen to our show, listen to Totally Rad Show's...uhh...show, read reviews, and make a decision for yourself!
justin
I'm a little confused about this because, as someone who loves TRS... 2/3 of them said the movie was almost unwatchably bad.
The only one who liked it was Alex who is the same person who skips all game cut scenes, doesn't like comic books unless they're about superheroes and won't get excited about movies where they talk a lot. I love the guy and watch all his shows, and frequently agree with him, but he definitely represents the low brow scale of TRS.
http://tformers.net/g/generated/11279/transformers2-promos-megan-fox_net-3__scaled_500.jpg
Did anyone pay attention to the scenes with the soldiers? The two most important soldiers are William Lennox (a white man) and Robert Epps (a black man), both of whom I believe are from the first movie. Anyways, every scene they're in, Lennox has all this dialogue in which he vocalizes his support of the autobots and how important they are. Epps then follows this with a one-liner in slang. This goes on in EVERY SINGLE SCENE with the soldiers. Lennox's "We have to protect Optimus and find Sam Witwicky!" is met by Epps' "We 'bout to get our ***** kicked!"
I'm not one to talk about race in movies, but I couldn't help it with this one. I seriously think Michael Bay or whoever was in charge of this (probably Michael Bay) either really believes or promotes that this is how black people talk.
Coming from a true Transformers Fan-boy (I collected them as a kid, watched the cartoons while they were still on air, and saw the original movie when it came out in theaters) trust me when I say that the movie was true to the name.
The movie has a lot of elements of the original cartoon in it. I won't ruin it for you, but anyone that has watched the cartoons (oldschool or newschool) will be able to pick out all the goodies in the movie.
Could the movie have been better? Sure! But remember there is no such thing as a perfect movie, no matter how reminiscent you want to be. This is definitely worth of the title it has as "Summer Blockbuster". Take the kids, or special someone and see it. You will have a good time--promise.
Also, the ***** gun and robot testicles, ***? This is a movie directed towards KIDS, that's the problem for any fanboys who are wondering why people are pissed about that.
not really a kids movie, and its a movie for anyone who wants to see it!
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by atomicbomb156
July 1, 2009 3:45 PM PDT
- Lots of explosions + robots that transform into various vehicles and back into robots + ridiculously hot girl = very entertaining movie. Isn't that what movies are meant for? I like my movies simple, straightforward, and some hot girls interjected here and there. If I want plot I'll go read a book or watch a play.
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