Joke all you want, but Siri is pretty cool. And Google Search? Even cooler. Just one problem: These voice-powered assistants require you to take your phone out of your pocket, purse, briefcase, or whatever. You can't just talk to the air and have your commands recognized.
What you need is one of those "Star Trek: The Next Generation"-style communicators, the kind Captain Jean-Luc Picard wore on his chest. One little tap and he's all, "Commander Data, meet me in Engineering."