toys

Don't you f***ing love cute stuffed animals?

They're the s***. But Entertainment Earth has taken huggable plush toys to an entirely new level with the Swear Bear.

Here are the f***ing basics: you hug the innocent-looking Swear Bear, and in turn, it swears profusely. We're talking classic phrases such as "Hey d***head, what're you--some kind of pervert, gotta touch teddy bears?" and "Eat s*** and die!" Awww, that's so f***ing adorable.

In addition to making Tickle-Me Elmo look like a complete a******, the Swear Bear costs only … Read more

This polished silver digital piggy bank records the cash you feed it and displays the total on an LED screen. It aims to teach kids the value of a dollar, according to the manufacturer, and costs $24.95 at the Science eStore.

But oddly enough, the seemingly modern Pig E Bank Electronic Bank doesn't take dollars. It only recognizes pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters. As RedFerret noticed, that's a lot of coinage needed to save for a new PlayStation 3.

Considering the U.S. dollar coin has big plans starting in 2007, what kind of hogwash is that?… Read more

If James T. Kirk was sitting by a tree or menorah or visiting Africa come Chrismahanukwanzakah time, you'd better believe he'd be craving the Star Trek 40th anniversary phaser. It's hit shelves in honor of 40 years of "boldly going where no man has gone before."

With the bronze handle, flashing lights and four power modes, the phaser looks and feels a lot like the stun gun of the original series. If you're hoping to participate in the away team, the Type I phaser easily detaches, while still providing light and sound features. Speaking … Read more

I really am a young hip mom (references upon request), but I'm still struggling with this souped-up version of a classic childhood accoutrement--the jump rope.

Highlights, the authority on all things tech (insert snark here), is selling the battery-operated Electronic Jump Rope Jam, which features speakers in the handles that play rhythmic beats "and guide you in nine routines."

Now my 6-year-old, who has been jumping rope (or is it jump-roping?) through the past couple months of her life, would probably love to show up her playground friends with the "Jam," which only costs $10.… Read more

This is one little guy that could be dangerous. At first glance, Bandai's NetTansor looks like a lot of other cute robot toys on the market--but don't be fooled.

It's equipped with a WiFi webcam that can beam transmissions back to its owner's screen, according to Gizmodo, with a power supply that can provide up to "two and a half hours of voyeuristic fun." You can talk to it through email or just let it bop around on its own, because the NetTansor has sensors to keep it from running into walls or inflicting … Read more

Ever since seeing "Silence of the Lambs," we just haven't been able to think of night-vision goggles the same way. But this toy may have resurrected its image as something other than a surveillance tool for serial killers.

The Discovery store is selling a pair of the nocturnal lenses that can shoot darts, according to Coolest Gadgets. And they're even the old-fashioned kind with rubber tips that can stick to the foreheads of your targets--lessening the chances of recurring nightmares we might have about more sinister uses.

(Photo: Cool Gadgets)